Basics of Ponytail Management at IIPM -1
In this second post of the series, I will explain the basics of ponytail management as exponded by none other than Arindam Chaudhuri of IIPM fame.
The human brain has a limited capacity as it is enclosed in an inflexible skull. The human skull is covered with hair that dissipates the knowledge in the brain radially outward. Therefore all the education in the world (specially from the IIM group of institutions) will not help as most of it will enter the ear and get dissipated radially outward through the hair on the skull. To conserve the knowledge you need to build an effective and efficient ponytail that is effectively grounded by pointing downwards. This enables the fantastic knowledge gained from IIPM to be effectively preserved and can be used in small potent doses when you work in Planman Consultants after graduation from IIPM.
This is an important concept that has been missed by all the IIM group of institutions. They do not know about ponytail management and therefore select students who keep their hair waving freely - thus the miniscule knowlege that the get at IIM is immediately dissipated radially outward leaving them with neither IQ nor EQ.
At IIPM we only select students with long hair that can be tied into a ponytail - this is the reason that we usually have more girls admitted than boys - girls have higher ponytail potential. Infact studies at IIPM have shown that girls who have their hair braided into a ponytail from early childhood have higher potential and our selection process at IIPM carefully investigates this to select the most promising girl candidates.
Unfortunately the fee that we charge often leaves their parents without any hair - but our IIPM parents are willing to sacrifice their hair for the sake of their wards and for the future of our country.
The human brain has a limited capacity as it is enclosed in an inflexible skull. The human skull is covered with hair that dissipates the knowledge in the brain radially outward. Therefore all the education in the world (specially from the IIM group of institutions) will not help as most of it will enter the ear and get dissipated radially outward through the hair on the skull. To conserve the knowledge you need to build an effective and efficient ponytail that is effectively grounded by pointing downwards. This enables the fantastic knowledge gained from IIPM to be effectively preserved and can be used in small potent doses when you work in Planman Consultants after graduation from IIPM.
This is an important concept that has been missed by all the IIM group of institutions. They do not know about ponytail management and therefore select students who keep their hair waving freely - thus the miniscule knowlege that the get at IIM is immediately dissipated radially outward leaving them with neither IQ nor EQ.
At IIPM we only select students with long hair that can be tied into a ponytail - this is the reason that we usually have more girls admitted than boys - girls have higher ponytail potential. Infact studies at IIPM have shown that girls who have their hair braided into a ponytail from early childhood have higher potential and our selection process at IIPM carefully investigates this to select the most promising girl candidates.
Unfortunately the fee that we charge often leaves their parents without any hair - but our IIPM parents are willing to sacrifice their hair for the sake of their wards and for the future of our country.

7 Comments:
At Wednesday, December 07, 2005 12:27:00 AM,
Soumyadip said…
IIM what on planet earth is that? I searched on Google and found out. This leads me to wonder why is the GoI wasting resources on these institutes. Doesn't IIPM and it's wide international network backed by world class faculty and infrascture etc. etc. (and full page ads in the national dailies) suffice?
IIPM is also doing the national economy a lot of good. To fund education at the esteemed institution many a parent have dug into their black money. If many more IIPM campuses are set up around the nation a lot of black money can be legitimised. Helping our economy to reach further heights. The IT Department is simply wasting time with their Voluntary Income Disclosure Schemes. Go the IIPM way. Hope the PM is listening.
At Wednesday, December 07, 2005 3:45:00 AM,
Anonymous said…
You ppl should respect the power of pony-tail. Narad Muni used it as an antenna to transmit/recieve information. Professaar Chawdurry is now using it to transmit his bullshit to unsuspecting & gullible students
At Wednesday, December 07, 2005 4:45:00 AM,
K said…
What came first the ponytail or the management guru?
At Wednesday, December 07, 2005 10:14:00 PM,
Nachowski said…
This blog is just so pathetic, idiotic, sad, and FREAKIN' INGENIOUS.
At Thursday, December 08, 2005 1:28:00 PM,
Amit Varshneya said…
Hilarious !!!
At Friday, December 09, 2005 4:41:00 PM,
Khakra said…
word up, ponytail
At Sunday, January 22, 2006 2:37:00 AM,
silverine said…
A very sardonic and tongue in cheek post.Loved it !!!
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